Five Months In – Personal Summary

Ok, I don’t really do this very often,
but apparently I am being a dick for not sending enough emails,messages and pictures to my people, so I thought maybe I will do some sort of personal summary of the last 5 months of my travels in here.
Sooooooo ….
I have been only in South East Asia so far.
This culture is so totally completely different – it really took me a while to get used to it.
I a not gonna write an essay about it – I am sure you can find plenty of those on the Internet – I’ll just briefly tell you how I feel about it!

For starters – I’ve spent first 2 months of the travels literally changing my location almost everyday. And let me tell you something – it is EXTREMALY exciting, but very tiring as well! I think the worst thing is definitely the ‘fear of missing out’. You get into this mode of seeing everything and checking everything out, because WHAT IF I WILL MISS SOMETHING ?! (you panic about it!)
So you go to all the museums, temples, gardens, tours, rivers, mountains, old quarters and so on and so on and you get depressed, if you actually skipped something (when you meet some people on the way and they ask you – ‘have you seen this? It’s fantastic!’ and you almost start crying, because you skipped it or didn’t know about it!)
Also I had this inner pressure that I put on myself. I had to prove myself to everyone, because many people think I am a loser and cannot actually be organised for shit! So I kinda wanted to show a middle finger to everybody who said I haven’t done enough research or I am too reckless to survive travelling by myself so far and not get into any trouble.
Let me break the news for you – I am still alive and kicking and hardly got in any trouble, because I am not stupid and I can take care of myself! ; )
Anyway, the first two months included Vietnam (which I madly fell in love with!), Thailand and Cambodia. I saw so many absolutely breathtaking places and had tons of amazing adventures! I would not have done anything differently!
You will eventually read about every single place I visited, but be patient ; )

My next big adventure is Bali.
The whole point of my Trip is not to have a plan, but my ‘kinda’ plan was to stay in Bali for about 2 months and then proceed further East, but I fell in love with it.
It got to me within a week! I started surfing, doing yoga, I met people who became my family. So the idea of leaving so early got buried under all the plans I made on this ‘Island of Gods’.
Big part of it is Surfing. Whoever knows me – they know how much I am scared of getting my head under the water, or how stressful it is to deal with it.
Anyway, from the first surf in the Indian Ocean – I was determined to fight with it! And I made such a big progress. (Although currently I started surfing (more like trying : /) in harder spots, and it feels like I am back to square one, as I am shitting myself every time when I’m in the water and takes me about an hour to get rid of the panic state. But I will be trying until I will fucking succeed!) And getting injured everyday is kinda motivational ! ; )

Also I got introduced to yoga, which is something I never wanna get rid of. It’s great and it helps for everything! The body and your mind. Oh how fantastic it feels ! You should try it !
Geez, I started sounding like this ‘spiritual’ ‘I read Eat.Pray.Love., I’m completely changed!’ person. But I kinda am.
Fuck everybody – being positive about everything gets addictive! ; )

And of course on top of that – I’m not leaving Bali mainly, because I don’t have to pack everyday and I can simply spread my shit around for two weeks easily an not care about it ! ; )

How I changed?
It is funny how just couple of months can change your state of mind. I am not a different person – come on, let’s be real! – but I am definitely gaining some good stuff on a daily basis!
I have met so many inspirational people in the course of those 5 months – it’s unbelievable! They are inspirational, they are encouraging, they are energetic, I mean I have never in my entire life received so many positive vibes and it gets overwhelming.
Only here in Bali – I met so many young people who are searching for the good stuff in life and don’t get swallowed by the idea of competing in a rat race and having your life pass by while doing so. They are intelligent, creative, talented and determined. There are so many people in here following their passions, having their own companies, clothing brands, or working from abroad, without missing out on life. The pressure of ‘being somebody’ doesn’t apply to the lifestyle here, because it is very limiting. Nobody is dismissing their dreams, because someone’s opinion. Also – people in here know that failure is part of the process and they dust themselves up, and start over over again.
So … big shout out to all of you. The people who made me realise, that even if I am educated 26 year old with no experience in any field, lots of debt, currently trying to figure out who I am, who I wanna be and where I wanna be – it doesn’t mean that I am a failure and have nothing to give. I have so much ahead of me and the pressure of ‘having your shit sorted’ and investing in your own flat/car etc maybe is not for me. At least not for now, and despite what many people say – there is nothing wrong with it ; )

Also … I am being less of a dick. I know, I can be a judgemental ass hole and sometimes I think I am better than others. And I don’t respect people’s time and I swear too much and I am lazy and I am mean as my basic personality.
But … I am learning not to be that kind of me anymore. I try not to judge, not to look down on anybody, because for fucks sake, everybody has a story and I have no idea what the story is, so I should shut up more often!
Also! NOBODY is perfect and EVERYBODY makes mistakes, and there is NOTHING wrong with it! (I think this one is the hardest one for me to accept : p)
I’m trying to give up my ‘Little Miss Knows It All’ attitude and listen more.
Be more appreciating and positive. Be more grateful, sympathetic,
And STOP BEING GRUMPY ! (which I perfected ; ))
So, smiles and love to spread only!
I am also starting to like animals… Baby steps, yea?! ; )

What do I miss?
Ok, now to the hard part !
I think the main thing I miss is the food. And maybe the food culture. I was never like number one fan of Asian food (which doesn’t mean I don’t like, because it’s fantastic!).
But everything in here is deep fried or sweet. And since I’m not a sweets person, but I’m definitely a snacks person, I am kinda suffering : p
It’s not like – you go to the supermarket, get the products and fix your own food.
Instead – you go to the local ‘warung’ (restaurant) and have all of it like twice cheaper. So it would be pointless to cook yourself, but at the same time – how long you can live off rice and noodles … : p
I miss a good real cheese! And salads and the little snacks I would be preparing at home : p
And I miss mayonnaise (which is weird and expensive here : p)
Of course, the fruit is Fantastic !!! Fresh bananas, dragon fruit etc ! So I’m not complaining in this department ! ; )

I would never have thought that the first thing to miss when travelling – is gonna be food haha !!
Anyway, next one is definitely the way how polite everyone is in UK for example. I think the most used phrase in England is ‘sorry’ or ‘thank you’.
In here is slightly different, as the way people speak to each other or to you is very bold and nobody is playing the ‘lets talk around it because we need to be polite’. In here – it sounds and it feels like everybody is shouting at you and at each other!

Next one from the ‘cultural series’ is how people in here simply cannot answer a basic question.
Let’s say, that I will be asking something like –
‘Is this black or white?’
and the answer will be probably something like
‘you know, yesterday I bought a grey jacket! It’s so good!’
This is a conversation that you will be having a lot in Asia (maybe not this particular one, but very similar), because let’s just say it – there is no such a thing like SPECIFIC in Asia, it just doesn’t exist. So making a deal, or clarifying something might take hours ; )

Another – very materialistic thing that I miss are simply my things!
I just miss having my desk! I miss my blue jeans! I miss my stuffed animals ! My teddies ! (I am really hoping nobody got that far in this note, because that’s gonna be embarrassing : p)
I miss my own bed, I generally miss my own space, a room that I can just lock myself in and not talk to anybody and just sit down for three hours and play guitar. (because that’s my new thing now p).
I miss fast internet haha ! ; )
But then in the end, when thinking about ‘Home’ and coming back – I don’t really have the place I miss or any place to call Home.
I have moved out from my Parents house when I was 19, and I have moved out from UK in December 2014, so technically I don’t have The Base to go back to.
It feels weird, but exciting in some ways.

Things, that I kinda hate?
The bugs, the ants, the snakes, the fact how loud the nature is around here!
And the cold showers I take everyday …
And I also hate the fact, that I don’t really miss my life from ‘before’ and it kinda makes me stressed : p

Ok, whoever made it to the end of this post deserves an award, post your email in comment and I’m sending postcards ! ; )
Kisses !!!

One reply to “Five Months In – Personal Summary

  1. Ciezko nie przeczytac do konca skoro Twoj blog jest wciagający…wiec szkoda że tak mało piszesz….powodzenia w dalszych wyprawach.Jestes niezwykle odważna!!!I zdjęcia robisz fantastyczne!!!Jesli moge zapytać o sprzet jaki używasz i czy Twoj obiektyw lub obiektywy tak pieknie oddaja kolory czy podrasowujesz w ps-ie lub innym lightroom-ie???

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